Death

An empty bench along a trail in the woods. There is a plaque on it commemorating someone, but the writing is illegible.

Losing a loved one sucks. It hurts. It's inevitable.

What can I say that hasn't been said a billion times already, and by voices more eloquent than mine?

Nothing!

We need to figure this out ourselves. Don't let anyone tell you how you must mourn or when you should be over it, whatever the f*** that means.

Yeah, but also don't reject advice out of hand. It might be useful in ways they didn't intend. It might help you figure things out.

Given that, here's all I'll tell you: think, now, about how the death of someone you care about would affect you, or how yours would affect them. What can you do to prepare? Are there things you should be doing with them, for them? Things you want to do?

It's easier to think about this now, when it isn't an issue. Even just considering it ahead of time might lessen the shock. Maybe. I don't know.

What I do know is this: the first time you do something shouldn't be when it really freaking matters. Anything that gets you even a little more ready can help.

I can't promise you'll get through this. Whatever that means. I do hope the best for you.

Thank you, for all that you've done for me. I am a better person for it. I will continue to do my best to help and support those who you care about. Thank you.

—Me, December 4, 2025