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3

2012
2012

Directed by Roland Emmerich

The ratings I assign should reflect the quality of the TEotWaWKI survival advice, not the movie itself. This is difficult when a good movie steers you wrong, like 28 Days / Weeks Later, or a poorly written book chock full of excellent tips. For the movie 2012, though, I have no such difficulties. This is truly a bad movie unredeemed by any useful pointers. It's not really the director's fault. The end of the world event is so catastrophic that there's nothing you can do, despite the implausible ending of this story.

The movie is bad on so many different levels. You have nearly every cliché present. You have implausible action after implausible action. I mean, truly, how many times do we have to see an air plane find the only safe flight path by flying under something improbable? And to top it all off, it was way too long. John Cusack must answer for this. How can an actor of such quality associate himself with this crap?

If you're a teenage boy or you have nothing else to do and don't mind wasting money, then I suppose you should see this. It does have some astounding special effects, even if they do defy your ability to suspend disbelief. Just remember, if we are faced with an astronomical event of this magnitude, the only thing you can do is make peace with your God and then throw one hell of a party.